According to my sources, it was the 2015 MTV Movie Awards last night, which I didn’t watch because I had better things to do. …Stop laughing. I haven’t gotten to the punchline yet. Anyway, I’ve still got some of the highlights for you today, like Emily Ratajkowski here. I’m guessing she didn’t win anything, but the good news is, I’ve got a consolation prize for her: Best Cleavage of the Night. It’s by far the most coveted trophy and I’m sure all the other hotties are extremely jealous that Emily gets to pick up her award at a private ceremony in my mom’s basement. …OK fine, now you can laugh.